"Oopsa Daisy, It's OK"

Starflower,

You say the cutest things and make me smile every day.  I love you!!

Love,
Mom

Beautiful Ballerinas

Mommy's Gifts

Be Inspired,
Janelle Joy

Tiny Triumph: Knitted Sweater

I completed the sweater I started a little while ago.  I made it size 1x in case my pregnancy made it so it is way big and will be more of a snuggie blanket than a sweater, but I am really excited that I finished it and that I made it all out of a big bag of leftover yarn my hubby found for me at a thrift shop.  I did it as one of my young women personal progress goals for knowledge.  I have never knitted a sweater for myself before.  It was really fun to do.

What are you happy you accomplished today!

Be Inspired,
Janelle Joy

Enjoying the Dance.

Starflower is so excited to be at ballet class.  She has been yelling and jumping up and down like she does each Monday morning when she finds out it is dance class day. I am sitting here trying not to cry.  Writing will help me get my feelings out in a "more acceptable in public" way. 

I still feel pain from the miscarriage and it was hard to find the energy to take her to class. Now I am here with several new moms and their babies and a few expecting moms.  I am not feeling jealous and I am happy for them.  But it does remind me of what I hoped for and what I am missing out on now. 

Since having Starflower 2 years ago there have been three more miscarriages and failed fertility treatments and then several months without a pregnancy.  I now know that the heparin shots that seemed to be the miracle answer that helped me carry Starflower is not the answer to help with another pregnancy.  I was  also adjusting to the mentality that I am 38 now and maybe I am done having babies.  Then suddenly I am expecting and so surprised and happy.  I just started getting my baby bump and had just begun to really think this time was going be a healthy pregnancy since I made it past 7 weeks with no bad symptoms (which is usually a great sign for me. Almost all have been lost before the 7 week mark). I had adjusted again --to thinking about car seats and a mini van and changing other plans with my older girls to accommodate how my pregnancy would affect me and how a new baby in October would fit into our life.  Then 1 week later it was all over again.  My life is a dance with giant, sudden and drastic mood changes.

I have a few more weeks before I will recover physically.  I have to be careful and choose my activities wisely and watch for postpartum depression and everything.  However, there is no new baby to care for.  Without a belief in a life after this one, it would all seem so pointless.

But it isn't pointless.  There is a reason for it all. And I am still glad to have experienced 8 weeks with that little one. I am thankful for the dance.

What is happening in your dance today?

Be Inspired,

Janelle Joy

"S'anna Snuggo Me"

Starflower,

As I tucked Lady Slipper into bed, you woke up and suddenly said  in your sweet little voice "Sa'annah  snuggo me!" (Savannah snuggle me).  She was too tired to move and so you asked me to "snuggo me mom. Snuggo me." Which I happily did.  I felt your soft hands reaching out as you began to talk again "fingus  mom. Fingus" until each one clasped one of my fingers.

Simply Heaven even at 2am. (And definitely a Tiny Triumph in my day).

I love you my little one,

Mom

Piano All Done, Mom

Starflower,

After each song at church today you would say "Piano done mom."  I am surprised at how  many instrument names you know.  You pointed some out to me last night as we watched Music and the Spoken Word.

You are saying lots and lots of full sentences now and you are so confident in telling us your needs and wants. It is so cute to hear you.  Today you told  my friend Heather "Hold my hand, Hedder."  And lately you have been starting to say the prayer yourself when you know we are about to say blessing on the food or family prayer by saying "Bless Mom. Bless S'anna.  (Savannah/Lady Slipper)  Bless Lisa (Angelisa/Morning Glory)  Bless Dad. Amen!!" And you dramatically spread your arms out wide as you finish.

I love being your Mom.
Thank you for coming to our family.

Love,

Mom

Tiny Triumph: Homeschool

Be Inspired,
Janelle Joy

How We Listen to General Conference

Listen to Conference!!
It is so much fun!!

Be Inspired,

Janelle Joy

Starflower Stories

Tonight Starflower woke up for a snack.  She loved her applesauce, puffed millet and peanut butter all mixed together.  Then she still needed a little more snuggle time before being tucked back in  so I started to read her some board book stories we picked  out to read for library story time.  One of her favorites is "Five little Monkeys Reading in Bed" by Eileen Christelow.  I think it is because of all the funny  sounds the monkeys make as they laugh and cry through their stories.  She also loves me signing the ASL sign for monkey on her sides. It makes her giggle too.

Now I am awake and ready to read too. . .

I love being a mom.

Be Inspired,

Janelle Joy

Messy Faces

It is so fun to see pictures  of myself  and my three little girls all at age 1 and with very similar messy faces.

How else are we all similar?

Be Inspired,

Janelle Joy

The First Christmas!!

My beautiful Starflower,
You are such a wonderful gift to me!!
The only thing under that tree that I really care about.
Happy first Christmas!!
Love,
Mom

Exploring Avocado

She is sure having fun. . .

I am too. Today I tried using avocados to  make healthy chocolate ice cream
(Paleo, dairy free, sweetened only with maple syrup, and I even substituted carob powder instead of cocoa)
It tastes good as us right from the blender as a mousse, but I can't wait until it freezes.  See oatmealwithafork.com/2013/08/19/perfect-chocolate-ice-cream-vegan-paleo/

Perfect family home evening dessert.

Be Inspired,
Janelle Joy

Real Life So Soon

Back to real life so soon. . . Good thing they are cute!! And thank goodness for bath time  breaks for mommy!!

Be Inspired,
Janelle Joy

Bath Time

Yea, I can actually clean the bathroom and have no interruptions of little cuties needing Mom "right now"

They have been in there playing for quite a while and still getting along and happy :)!!

It's the little things.  . .

Be Inspired,
Janelle Joy

Smoothie Fingerpainting

She sure loves to share my fruit smoothie and especially when I mix it with baby cereal and she paints her tray.  I constantly remind myself that the messes are worth cleaning up. After all, serving "the least if these" especially includes my own little sweetheart.

Be Inspired,
Janelle Joy

New Year's Eve

Can they make it to midnight?
Morning Glory is determined to and still going strong.
Lady Slipper was determined to and an hour ago we found her hidden behind a couch pillow fast asleep.
And our new little Starflower didn't even try to make it; in fact she slept most of the day.