My Testimony of Scripture Study and Prayer

I have been completing my own Personal Progress goals along with Morning Glory as she works on her Young Women program.  The first experience goal in the Choice and Accountability section focuses on the importance of daily scripture study and prayer to enable all of us to make decisions which lead to happiness.  It required me to think back and notice how my decisions have been shaped by my choice to always study and pray.  I am so thankful I made that choice as a little, tiny primary girl, even before I was old enough to be baptized.

Without scripture study and prayer, I would make many wrong decisions in my life. My major in college would have been focused on English instead of mostly on family. I would not have known it was important for my mission on earth to finish college and get married instead of going on a full time mission. I would not have married Robert.
I would not have known it was right to stay with him when things got really tough. I may have given in to well meaning advice that my own health was more important and I would not have my three girls.
I would have lost confidence in myself, especially when I felt overcome with health challenges and anxiety and depression.
I would not have known that full time school instead of home school was right for Morning Glory and which schools she should attend. I would not have known when it was time to turn those decisions over to her. I would not have known When it was right for me to leave my parents and live in California and later when it was right to move to St. George. I would not have known when it was important for me to stay home with my girls full time and when it was important for me to work at The Learning Center for Families. I would not have recovered from the grief of losing my baby Benjamin and my other little lost ones.

My life is truly only what it is because of scripture study and prayer

Be Inspired,

Janelle Joy

Postpartum Psychosis

Wow.  Postpartum psychosis is real and can be so scary.  I spent several days in the hospital and now continue to work toward recovery at home.  I am thankful that in my psychosis, I never wanted to harm myself or my beautiful starflower or anyone else. Studying about the condition has enlightened me to understand that fact is a huge blessing in itself.

I continue to feel scared.  But I also remember that no matter what I suffer, all of it us worth it in order to have my beautiful baby.  And my personal testimony of Heavenly Father, His Son Jesus Christ and His plan for me can keep me going through anything.

I will not give up!!

Be Inspired,

Janelle Joy

The Parable of the "Less than Perfect" Performances

"There are times when we have to step into the darkness in faith, confident that God will place solid ground beneath our feet once we do. And so I accepted gladly, knowing that God would provide." (President Dieter F Uchtdorf, "The Why of Priesthood Service" General Conference April 2012)

In my journey of experiencing several miscarriages (six so far), despite specific revelation telling me of the importance of those pregnancies, I continued to have faith in the inspiration I had received and the hope I felt for the future.  However, as this sixth miscarriage was imminent, I began to wonder if it was time for me to ask more questions--to seek the solid ground underneath my faith.  With that question on my mind and in my prayers, I attended BYU Education Week, believing that even if I did not receive the answer to that specific question, it was somehow important for me to be there, where I could receive personal inspiration with more power since I was in a place dedicated for spiritual learning and I had that entire week to devote to that spiritual learning and leave other cares in the background for a time. 

I was not disappointed. As I sat listening to the campus Devotional on Tuesday, my mind started to wander away from the topic, even though the speaker was one I greatly admire and had looked forward to hearing  (Elder Tad Callister).   I have learned that when I am ready to learn and I am prepared, it is good to pay attention when my mind wanders in that way.  What came to my mind was a parable which I knew applied to me and my question about miscarriages, but I also felt may have meaning to others as they apply it to their own circumstances and so I wrote down carefully in my notebook so I could share how what seems like a "less than perfect performance" may actually be perfectly crafted just for you:

"I will look at my miscarriages as a musical performance I was asked by my father to perform.  I agreed to obey.  I prepared the best I knew how and performed the specified song at the specified event.  My performance had many flaws.  It seemed a failure.  I was tempted to question but chose to accept even the failed performance as significant in some way.

Five more times I prepared for a performance of the same song.  I did not refuse.  I prepared.  I hoped for success.  I trusted my Father and I obeyed Him.  Each time I made sure I was where I was supposed to be at the right time for the performance.  I performed to the very best of my ability and even prayed for help and received priesthood blessings for divine help and strength.  Each performance began well but seemed to fail before the end.

Each time I was tempted to believe I must have misunderstood what my Father was asking me to do" because I know He does not ask me to do something I cannot do."  Each time I chose not to question the commandment.  Each time I chose to believe that in my Father's eyes, somehow that I can't understand, His purpose truly was being fulfilled and my performance was not a failure even though the improvements in my ability to play the song showed very little measurable increase.  Each time I began preparing again to be ready as soon as Father asks me again even though each past performance was so painful for me.

Finally, I went to My Father and asked Him if He wanted me to know why or if I should just continue to obey and accept . . .I wanted only to do what He wants me to do.  He answered me.  He wants me to understand. and someday I will.  Until then I will keep obeying and keep accepting less than perfect performances."  (Janelle Joy's personal notebook, August 14, 2012)


Line upon line, throughout that week, I learned more and more of the importance of my obedience and how each one of those miscarriages has had much more significance in my life and my family's lives than I could have imagined.  Details are not important, or even appropriate to share, since they are specific answers given to me.  But I do want to testify that the answers did come.  I no longer look at those miscarriages with a feeling of sadness or pain.  I no longer look to the future wondering how many more I may be asked to endure.  Now I walk no more in darkness about that particular challenge, I walk on the solid ground of knowledge.  I know that with every challenge we are given, if we continue on in faith, there truly will be a time when we will be able to see the importance and significance of every "less than perfect performance" we perform in our efforts to obey.

Be Inspired,

Spiritually Saving: I Belong to the Only True Church

I echo these words of a prophet of God and know that I belong to the only true Church, The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints:

"I have had men ask me: “Of what benefit is your church more than some other church?” I have tried, in a tactful way, to explain to them the difference. Any organization may band together for worship, but that does not give them divine authority. Any group of churches may mass together and organize community churches. That does not confer divine authority. Men may unite for good purposes, but authority from our Heavenly Father is only obtained in his way, and his way in former days was by calling and ordaining men and setting them apart for the work. The same thing is true in our day. …

"People should be made to understand that just to bow before the Lord in prayer does not give them divine authority. To live up to the requirements that are made of honesty, virtue, truth, etc., does not give them divine authority. … It is not sufficient that we pray, that we attend church. It is necessary that we possess divine authority, and it is the claim that we possess that authority that has brought upon this Church much of the persecution that has followed it from the beginning. But it is the truth and many of our Father’s children are beginning to observe the effect of divine authority in this Church. They see the development that is made in the lives of men and women.

"I personally do not desire to be understood to be finding fault and criticizing the people who belong to the various denominations of the world. I am thankful that there are in so many of them good men and good women who believe in him and with the light that they have serve God; but the fact remains that our Father has established in this world, his Church. He has conferred upon men in this day his authority, and there is no other authority in the world that he will recognize but that which he himself has instituted."

(Teachings of President George Albert Smith, Chapter 5)

Be Inspired,
Janelle Joy


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